By Jeff Salter
Stuff happens to me. The subject this time is Turkey.
I'm at Arby's ordering a sandwich and ask the clerk which one of the three new turkey s/w is most popular. She doesn't know ... but the manager comes over and gives me the detailed breakdown. I order the "New Grand Turkey Club" (which does not taste nearly as majestic as it sounds).
My point here is that all three of us have been talking TURKEY for about 5 minutes. So I wait for my order to come up.
The clerk who took my order makes eye contact and says my s/w is ready. I pick up the bag and thank her... and exit.
I'm in my truck backing out when she comes racing out the door waving broadly. I know I got the correct change, so it's not about money. Maybe she's a reader who wants info about my novels, I think. As if.
I roll down my window.
"You've got two fish in that bag," she explains, breathing heavily from the exertion.
"You mean, this bag, that you gave me?" I ask rhetorically, attempting to put the responsibility back where it belongs.
"That's not your order. That's fish." She reaches for the bag.
"I'll bring yours back out," she says over her shoulder as she races to the counter with the bag of fish.
I don't figure to wait in my truck, because I don't know if I'll ever see a sandwich I paid $5 for. So I go back inside. The guy whose fish I had gives me a narrow look.
I just smile. What's the penalty for stealing two fish s/w when you were given a bag with alleged turkey?
The manager hands me a bag and says, "This is YOUR sandwich." Almost like she's warning me not to try this caper again.
- - - -
Actually, even though the girl handed the bag directly to me, the true owner of that order remarked (when I re-entered) that he'd thought it was quite a coincidence that I had ordered the same thing he'd ordered.
That made me think the girl had mentioned what was in the bag. But I didn't hear anything except, "Here's your order, Sir."
* * * * * *
This is a true story from Possum Trot, four years ago this month.